Lesson 4: Yes, Safe Sex! And Yes, YOU have options!

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Good Day, Students! 

Happy PRIDE Month 🌈


Welcome to Sex-Ed class 😊. Our Forth lesson will cover: 

Yes, Safe Sex! And Yes, YOU have options!

What is Safe Sex and Why is it Important?

Safe sex is the practice of protecting yourself, and your partner from STIs (Sexually Transmitted Infections) (Planned Parenthood, 2010) and lowers the possibility of unplanned pregnancies. 

In layman's terms, we will have fewer "children having children" or ill-prepared adults having children and fewer chances of unexplained burning, itching, rashes, or discharge from our unmentionables (vagina, penis, anus, mouth, etc.).

So learning about safe sex and how to practice it, is vital for all people, especially those who are currently sexually active. Yes, it doesn't matter if you are married, dating, sweethearting, 'talking', or paying for play, this still applies to you. 


The Myths of Safe Sex!

If you remember lesson 3, where we talked about getting nastily in love with yourself, we also discussed the power and dangers of Myths. In this case, it's very dangerous because Myths are generally passed on as facts to convince or entice a potential sexual partner to perform sex outside of their respective boundaries. 

There are two things I want all of you to keep in mind: 
  1.  Your trust should never be free, it should be earned. 
  2. Your boundaries are made by you, for you, to protect you. Compromise is NOT an option.
In the table below you will see a compiled list of safe sex Myths and Truths:

Safe Sex Myths

Safe Sex Facts

Having sex in the sea, pool, or any body of water will prevent pregnancy and (or) STI (especially if you are standing or the female partner is on top).


You can potentially get pregnant and contract an STI if you are having unprotected sex. Location doesn’t matter, and water can help guide the sperm further into the vagina canal. 


Also, water is not toxic to sperm, so they will keep swimming. That means a Bath or Douching after sex will not prevent anything either.


In addition to potentially getting pregnant, and contracting an STI, you may also develop a yeast infection. 

“My pull-out game strong, so we have nothing to worry about!”

A male penis secretes pre-cum or a clearish liquid when he is excited/erect. If you are a man, or ever sucked dick, then you know exactly what I am talking about. 


Although pre-cum clearish, there is still SPERM in it. So you can get pregnant regardless of how “strong” his pull-out game is. 

He or She looks clean, so I trust that they ain't got nothing. 

It isn’t easy to tell if someone has an STI. Sometimes, they are primarily carriers and show no symptoms or they are in the early stages where the symptoms are barely noticeable. 


Everything is all fun and games until you start peeing fire.

“All I did was give him/her head, and we used a condom after so we straight!”

Nope!

You can contract an STI through Oral sex and condoms can have holes, break, or expire. So they aren’t foolproof, and you should get regularly tested regardless.

“You allergic to latex? Okay, then I'll just pull out.”

Don’t let anyone fool you. There are MANY latex-free condom options! My favorite brand is SKYN! No this isn’t promotional, I’ve legit used them for years and they never failed me.

Men don’t need to worry about contraception, they ain't the ones getting pregnant.

Regardless of who can get pregnant or not, the decision to have sex was between 2 people, not 1. Hence the outcome of this falls on both partners and not one (regardless of how society acts about this). 


So gentlemen, regardless if she is on the pill or not:

- Don’t show up without condoms.

- Don’t refuse to use condoms. 

- Always use a condom unless you are willing to assume the risks involved.

“2 condoms are better than 1!” 


“It’s only been expired for a month or 2, we should be straight!”

Nope, Nope, and Nope!


Never double up on condoms.

  1. It's a waste of your money. 

  2. This makes it easier to break during sex. 

Never use expired condoms!

  1. 100% guaranteed to break.

  2. Stop being cheap, and replace that condom you keep in your wallet/ dresser.

“I can’t hug, touch, use the bathroom, or drink from someone with HIV, let alone have sex with them!”

Actually, HIV can only be contracted through these 4 liquids:

  1. Semen 

  2. Blood 

  3. Breast Milk 

  4. Vaginal Fluids

Saliva, urine, and tears do not count. So open wounds (including razor bumps) and unprotected sex can leave you open to contracting HIV. 


However, it isn’t a death sentence! Medication for HIV has advanced to the point that people with the virus can manage well enough to live a long life, and not pass it on to others (even with unprotected sex).

- (Baylor College of Medicine, 2024; Florida State University, 2024; Health Four Teens, 2015, & Queensland Government, 2024)

Do you remember what we learned in lesson 1? Consent is freely given, and freely taken, and can not be given under false pretenses, manipulation, or coercion. So to the 'Old-heads' hitting up the youth 18 and younger with these Myths, YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF THEIR LACK OF KNOWLEDGE AND UNDERSTANDING. To the youth and adults who were told and experienced these Myths, YOU ARE BEING LIED TOO!


What are your options?

Although the motto of our Christian Nation is Abstinence (the act of not having sex at all), there is a wide variety of other safe Sex options that are available to you! The good news is that some of these can be free of charge once you go through the local Government Health System 😊. To find out how to request birth control locally you can visit here!

There are also organizations like The Bahamas Sexual Health and Rights Association or The Bahamas Aids Foundation that help to provide awareness, testing, and free contraceptives (like condoms) to the general public.

We all have a right to safe sex options, sexual exploration, and sexual adventures. So why not do it safe? Go ahead, take ya time, browse the table below, and see what's a good fit for you💜. 

Male

Female

Male condom 

- Can come in different materials like:

  • latex, non-latex, or lambskin.

- Can come in different Textures like:

  • Studded or rippled. 

- Can come in different flavors like: 

  • Bananas, Strawberries, Chocolate, etc.

-Can come in different sizes:
- Video on how to use a condom!

Female condom 

- General latex only

Diaphragm or Cervical cap

 - Can be rubber or silicone.

Contraceptive creams, foams, jellies and suppositories 

- Check ingredients for allergies.

- Video on how to use a Female condom!

Dental Dams

- Not offered in the Bahamas

- Usually latex only

- Used to protect yourself during oral sex. Mainly while eating pussy or ass, you would use a condom for sucking dick.

- You can make your own Dental Dam out of non-latex or latex condoms by following the instructions in this video.

Dental Dams

- Not offered in the Bahamas

- Usually latex only

- Used to protect yourself during oral sex. Mainly while eating pussy or ass, you would use a condom for sucking dick.

- You can make your own Dental Dam out of non-latex or latex condoms by following the instructions in this video.

Sterilization/ Vasectomy

- Seal off the ducts that carry sperm to the testicles. 

- Extremely short and minimally invasive surgery. 

- In fact, Bahamian Board-Certified Urologist Dr. Greggory Pinto (2019) attests that:

  • The surgery generally takes 10-15 mins,
  • It is the most effective form of birth control.
  • It is reversible!

The Pill

- Hormonal medication that you take once a day for 21 days to prevent pregnancy. 

- Recommended to take every day at the same time. 

- Usually do not stop your period. 

The Shot (DePo)

- Take a shot once every 3 months. 

- It can completely stop your period for that time and once you decide to stop taking the shot, you run the risk of an extended menstruation.

- If this happens you will need to be prescribed tranexamic acid. Speaking from experience! I used the shot once and couldn’t stop bleeding for a whole month after I decided to stop using it.

- I do not recommend the shot, but to each their own.


IUD

- T-shaped device that is inserted into the cervix. 

- Can be made out of a variety of materials including copper. 

- Can Last 3-10 years depending on the brand/type.

Norplant

- Small flexible 1-inch capsule that contains progesterone. 

- Implanted into the arm. 

- Last 5 years and will be removed.



Sterilization/ Tubes Tied

- Fallopian Tubes are cut and cauterized. 

- You may find difficulties getting this request fulfilled if you do not already have at least 1-3 kids. 

- Very invasive surgery with a long healing time.

- Generally not reversible.

- (PINTO, 2019; Teaching Sexual Health, 2024, & The Government of the Bahamas, 2024)


Conclusion

This definitely was a long lesson, and thank you all for taking the time to learn😁. I want to let you all know that I believe you all are smart and capable, but I never assume everyone is on the same page. So, for some of y'all, this is the basics, something new, a refresher course, or all three. As we close today's lessons, I want to reiterate that everyone IS responsible for their OWN sexual health! So here are a few things to remember and a few rules to live by (you choose which is which):
  1. Ladies, don't wait for that young man (or old man) to "forget" his condoms, ALWAYS HAVE YOUR OWN!
  2. Gentleman, if you can afford it, get the SNIP SNIP, and stop waiting on your girl, woman, wife, or baby mama, to get a major surgery so y'all can enjoy what y'all do without new "expenses" popping up. 
  3. Regardless if ya in a committed relationship, or sewing ya seeds and spreading ya wings, you should get tested every 6 months to Max 1 year.
  4. Always request test results from a new sexual partner, and it is always YOUR choice when you want to stop using safe sex.  


Happy Learning and Happy Foreplay ;)
- Mrs. Tease


PS: I will be posting some lessons in observation of PRIDE Month. So definitely look out for those!


References



Ending HIV. (2023, July 1). How to Choose The Right Condom: Condom Size Chart. Ending HIV. https://endinghiv.org.au/blog/how-to-pick-the-perfect-condom/

Florida State University. (2024, May 28). Myths and Facts | CHAW. Chaw.fsu.edu. https://chaw.fsu.edu/topics/sexual-health/myths-and-facts

Freepik. (2023). Freepik - Free Graphic resources for everyone. Freepik. https://www.freepik.com/

Health Four Teens. (2015, March 3). 10 Mega Myths About Sex. Health for Teens. https://www.healthforteens.co.uk/sexual-health/are-you-ready-for-sex/10-mega-myths-about-sex/

PINTO, DR. G. (2019, August 6). Vasectomy: A great family planning choice. Www.tribune242.com. http://www.tribune242.com/news/2019/aug/06/vasectomy-a-great-family-planning-choice/

Planned Parenthood. (2010). Planned Parenthood. Plannedparenthood.org. https://www.plannedparenthood.org/learn/stds-hiv-safer-sex/safer-sex

Queensland Government. (2024, April 4). Sexual health: myths vs truths. Queensland Health. https://www.health.qld.gov.au/newsroom/features/sexual-health-myths-vs-truths

Teaching Sexual Health. (2024a, May 31). Using a Dental Dam. Parents | Teaching Sexual Health. https://teachingsexualhealth.ca/parents/resource/using-a-dental-dam-video/

Teaching Sexual Health. (2024b, June 1). Using a Condom. Parents | Teaching Sexual Health. https://teachingsexualhealth.ca/parents/resource/using-a-condom-video/

Teaching Sexual Health. (2024c, June 1). Using a Vaginal Condom. Parents | Teaching Sexual Health. https://teachingsexualhealth.ca/parents/resource/using-a-vaginal-condom-video/

The Government of the Bahamas. (2024a, May 31). Contraceptive Methods. Ministry of Health and Wellness. https://t.ly/mrOTX

The Government of the Bahamas. (2024b, May 31). Contraceptives, Requesting - Government - Services. Ministry of Health and Wellness. https://t.ly/TrXrA

The Bahamas

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